This
is story is stupid, made for fun, and there is no reason to take it in any
serious manner.
This is the sequel story to "Homo Sama no
Daibouken".
"Elishah, wake up! Wake up
Elishah!"
"Who is Elishah?"
"You are!!! Did you forget your
name?!"
Homo Sama woke up. He was at a place
with sits with a desk to each one. All the people there were men, all of them
had something called "peot"; side hair that grows near the ear. Some
of those peot were curly, some were long, and the weird ones had peot that
looks like balls hair. They also were wearing on their heads something called
"kippah". All of those people were reading a massive book that tells
the story of insane mad god, with no logic behind his thoughts that promises a
certain ethnic group that they are the "chosen ones" and despite that
through the history they were murdered like flies. "Chosen ones" my
ass.
"Wait, I'm Elishah?" asked
Homo Sama.
"Yes you are!!! Stop being a
clown and listen to the lecture!!!" scolded him the prime rabbi of the
synagogue.
'So now I was born into a person that
already exists. Thank god! Now I don't have to relive a life of a child. This
is sure saves time. Hikaru!!! I'm on my way!!!'
The prime rabbi talked about how
great was the god for the Jewish people. How he always cared about them. Well
except the time that he forced Abraham to cut his dick… and the time that he
forced him to butcher his son… and the time he burned a poor bush just to show
off his magic to Moses… and the time that… there are too many… what a great
god!
Homo Sama went to the toilets after
the lecture has ended. He looked at his dick "Wha- what's wrong we that
dick?!!!!!"
"Elishah did you get mad?!"
said a Jewish believer named Jacob. "Your dick is fine! I know because I
was at your circumcision!"
"What is circumcision…. ? Never
heard about that… "
"Your parents really are sibling,
aren't they…?" sighed Jacob. "This is the act that we are the Jewish
people cut our dick at eight days after birth to show our unity with god…"
Homo tried to recall all the dicks he
saw in his life… Gon had one of those weird dicks, Nathan as well and maybe
Kaisa too. Zubi didn't have a dick like that. He wondered if Hikaru had a dick
like that. No! No thinking about that asshole that killed him fucking twice!
Homo continued to listen to the
boring lecture about the bible. At last, it was finally over! But, now that he
is already established person with a past behind him he must learn more about
that Elishah. He searched his bag. He found his identity document. Hmm… let's
see. First name: Elishah. Surname: Neumann. His age is 22 years old. Does that
useless shit even work? He was in that synagogue all fucking day! He was born
at the city "Sons of Thunder" in Canada. Father name: Eliahu. Mother
name: Miriyam.
"Wait… How Am I fucking going to
know where I live?!!!!" Homo realized that he'll have to stay the night in
the streets like a homeless. He waited two hours, and then he saw a sexy woman
with a cleavage. She looked like an outsider. No women in Sons of Thunder dress
like that. All of them live by the morality of showing as less skin as
possible.
"Shikseh!!!!!" called one
orthodox.
"Shiksehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!"
joined him some, then eventually hundreds. "Get back to Vivalet!!!!"
"Get outside of our city you
whore!!!!"
Homo will later learn that
"Shikseh" is the word that Elishah's buddies call for a woman that goes
against god's laws.
"Shikseh!!!!!!!!!!". The
woman ignored them until a nice lady told her that it better if she's will go
away. It could be dangerous for her.
"Elishah!" the nice lady
turned her attention to him. "What are you doing here? Your mother is
worried since you are not at home yet"
"Em… I kinda forgot the way
home… "
"Oh come on… I'll take you
there" she said. "Is everything alright with your disease?"
So looks like that Elishah is sick,
maybe for years. "It is alright" said Homo Sama.
Homo arrived at Elishah's home. It
was a small house; one living room and two bedrooms. The living room had no
television, only two armchairs. One of the bedrooms had only one bed. The
second bedroom was small, yet had three beds in it. Homo assumed that Elishah's
family was poor.
"Elishah!!!! You piece of dog
shit!" called his mother. "What's wrong with you?! I've heard how you
behaved today. And somehow you forgot how to get home?!"
"Mom! I'm hungry!"
complained one of Elishah's younger brothers.
"The food is almost ready!"
she smiled.
"Mom, when Elishah's is going to
get married? He is very old and still don't have a wife yet!" said the
second young brother.
"Your dog shit brother can't
find a wife now. What do you think a wife cares about? Simple! Only a man that
studies the Torah every day, takes the country's money and not working at all!
That's all a wife should care about! But Elishah can't do it at all!"
No mom… this is the worst thing that
a wife should care about when choosing a husband…
Homo had difficulty to restrain
himself. He can't show his true personality now. If he did then it may be
discovered that the real Elishah is gone. He realized that his revenge for
Hikaru will have to wait. He is no way of getting out Canada without money. He
must build himself as a great rabbi, getting some cash, and then start the
revenge.
"Fine! Mom, I'll study harder
tomorrow, I promise!" promised Homo Sama. "But before that, let me
help you with making the dinner."
"Mom I hate Elishah's
cooking" said one of the younger brothers. "Eating a ham is much
better than eating Elishah's shitty food"
The mom threw a vase on the poor kid.
"Don't even dare to joke about that!!! Eating a ham is a crime worse than
eating Elishah's food!!!"
Homo felt pity for the real Elishah.
This poor man suffers every day from his mom and brothers.
"Although… I agree" the mom
continued the smear campaign. "Your father is lucky to pass away before he
had the chance to eat Elishah's food."
Yep, that poor man…
Elishah went to sleep in the small
room with his brothers. At the morning, he woke up and went to the synagogue.
He sat down on his chair, and listened to the lecture.
"Men! Tomorrow we have a
mission!" announced the prime rabbi. "We have a trip to
Vivalet!!!"
"Isn't that city is the place
for all filth of the world? Those gays, lesbian, feminist, hipsters, and those
who kiss their dog?!" asked one believer.
"This is exactly why we are
going there! To clean all the scam of the world! Vivalet is the perfect place to
start! We'll meet at Dizzymaze mall, at a store called "I want to suck to
Yahoveh". After our mission, we'll return here!"
"Yeah!!!! Let's clean the
filth!!!"
Tomorrow has arrived. Homo Sama went
along with Jacob to the bus station at six AM. The bus arrived fifteen minutes
later. They will have to change two more busses, and then they should arrive at
Dizzymaze at around 9 AM. As they went in, the trip looked normal. All of the
people looked similar to them. The people changed in the second bus. The looked
weirder and weirder with each bus stop. People with blue hair entered the bus,
and super-hot guys with pink singlet. Now the two orthodox looked like if they
are the outsiders. It was like going into foreign country.
"Elishah…. Who are those weird
people…? I'm afraid…" said Jacob.
For Homo Sama however, it was like
eating a lunch. It was the most normal it can ever be. They finally arrived at
Dizzymaze. The mall looked very similar to erected dick. Homo was sure it was
designed like that on purpose. As they entered the mall, Jacob was at his
breaking point. He wanted to puke. "I'm going to the toilet a bit…"
Jacob didn't return. After 10 minutes
he found him fainted on the floor. Two gays fucked in the toilets. "Oh are
you his friend?" one of the asked. "I'm sorry; he fainted as soon he
saw us. But can you blame us?! It is normal to do this on Vivalet!"
"Or… I can join you for another
round!" said Homo Sama.
"Wow! See, I told you! I knew that all of the orthodox are gays!" The two gays and Homo Sama fucked for another ten minutes.
"By the way. Can you show me where is this store: "I want to suck to Yahoveh"?" asked Homo Sama.
"Oh it easy. It is on this
floor. Just go in a straight line, then turn right, and you are there."
After Jacob woke up, they went toward
the store. They turned right, and entered a store. They found themselves on the
top of the building.
"WAT DA FUCK?! It doesn't make
any sense!" said Jacob. "Let's return from where we came from". They
went of the store. They found themselves inside a kitchen of the fast food
burger.
"Get out!!!! How the hell did
you get here?!!!!" called the cook.
They went for 90 minutes and lost
their way. In the way they saw a store that attracted their interest.
"Elishah! What is this?!! This… giant pole!"
"Oh it is a dildo!"
"What it helps for?"
"You put it in your ass."
"Disgusting!"…. "Can
we try it? We are late anyway…". Jacob was never the same person after he
did this.
Finally, at 11 AM they arrived at the
store. "Sorry we are late" said Jacob.
"You are actually quite early.
The others haven't arrived yet" said the prime rabbi.
"You told us to get here at 9.
We are two hours late."
"Oh yeah, I told everyone the
wrong time because I assumed that you will have trouble finding the place. We
actually have to start at 1 PM."
"What's wrong with that place…
it is impossible to find where to go… it doesn't make any sense at all."
"Oh-oh! There a story about
that. The architect of this place was having a stroke while he designed it.
But, since he was a terrible dictator, nobody was brave enough to tell him that.
They were afraid that he'll kill them. Thus this place was created."
Ten minutes later all of the others
came in.
"Oh? How did you find the place
so early?" the rabbi asked.
"Simple!" answered one of
them. "The key is going to places that there are not gays and weirdoes in
them."
"Alright, since everyone is here
let's start!" the rabbi took out megaphones, and clubs. "Your mission
is simple! Half of you will shout "Shikseh!!!" to all of those slutty
women that ignores god's will to hide every bit of skin possible. The other
will finds the gays and hit them."
And so they did. Army of orthodox
roared the word "Shikseh!!!!!!!!" with not any sense. The others went
to annoy some gays.
"Homo Sama is with us!!!!"
called one of the gays. "He will destroy those homophobes!!!". Little
they knew that Homo Sama had to betray his believers just to blend in with the
orthodoxies.
After the day ended, it was count as
a "success". What success? Probably that they will be hated or
something. They returned to the synagogue and had the prayer until Friday at 7
PM. Indeed, Shabat has come in. "I'm going home" said one believer.
"Oh, see you tomorrow at the
morning!" said the rabbi.
The believer had trouble opening the
door. "My rabbi, did you lock the door? It won't open up!"
"No I didn't."
The man saw a paper beneath the door,
written with the words "we locked you inside as a revenge for hunting us.
The believers of Homo Sama"
"Fuck! We are locked in! Damn
those gays!"
"Oh there is no problem, my wife
has a spare key, I'll call her to release us" said one.
"Are you insane?!" roared
the prime rabbi "It is Shabat! We can't call her! No choice, we'll have to
wait until Shabat is over. Don't worry; there is enough food on the fridge for
all of us until tomorrow's evening."
And so, Shabat is over.
"Someone, call your family to release us" said the rabbi.
"Sorry I have no battery"
said one.
"Me too."
"Yeah, mine is dead…"
"None of you have a battery?!"
raged the rabbi. "You idiots! You had to turn off your phone
beforehand!"
"It was Shabat! We
couldn't!"
"Fuck!!!! We are locked here
forever!"
A week passed. The men tried to
survive. But nobody came to help. They starved, almost to death with no food.
"Need… something to eat…."
Jacob was on exhaustion.
"There is food!" said Homo
Sama.
"There is?! Elishah! Give it to
me!" said the prime rabbi.
"Yes. Only we have to do is to
suck to each other. The human sperm is very nutritious."
"Are you crazy?! This is against
god's will! We'll be no different than those filthy gays!" the rabbi got
crazy.
I allow it, don't worry.
"But my rabbi! You always said
that "Mental supervision rejects Shabbat". What time if it isn't
now?!" said one.
"Alright! You are right! No choice
then! God will forgive us!" said the rabbi.
And so, they sucked to each other
super super hard! Eventually they got super horny and turned it to mass anal
orgy. The intensity of the sex broke the door, but they realized it only 7
hours later because they had too much fun. Homo Sama died in the process. Yes,
the real Elishah was already dead because of his illness. Homo was born into a
dead body that will very short time before it will kill himself too.
"Elishahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!"
The day later it was Elishah's
funeral. All of the orthodoxies came in, as well as the gays from Vivalet. They
cried over the hero that saved them from starvation. The rabbi prayed for his
best in heaven. "Listen, thanks to Elishah we are alive… "
"I'm sorry…" said of the
Vivalet gays "It was just a prank! We didn't think he will die!"
"Listen, Elishah gave us this
way of life" said the rabbi. "I'm also now sexually attracted to all
of you guys…. Therefore, from today on, we'll suck a dick every day…"
